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Stock Trading Tips

No! I am not going to offer any strategies on how to trade in stocks or options, or to reap heavy profits in the stock markets. Simply because I don’t believe in any such strategies. Those candlestick charts could never illuminate my portfolio, and all hammer & inverted hammer candlesticks have hammered me down enough.

I don’t even pay attention to the stock analysts, who blabber something about technical and fundamental analysis – there is no such thing called as technical or fundamental analysis, it is pure simple gamble or luck or destiny whatever you want to call it; if it is your day you will make it, else best of luck – keep trying.

I have been attached to stock markets (emotionally) since last 10 years, trying to understand the dynamics of it, but the bloody selfish stock market has kept me (financially) detached from it. I had opened my first Demat and Online Trading Account with ICICI Direct – just because I had liked the application interface, and also the fantasies that all my earnings could immediately get transferred to my ICICI Bank Savings Account. This good ol’ ICICI Direct use to send me mailers about where & when to invest, what strategy to follow etc – I obeyed nothing. However, now I am tired, irritated, and annoyed too.

The mailers were okay to handle, at least I could select the entire list in the mailbox and delete it right away. I-Direct started giving me calls recently; I used to attend a few initially. A lady with polished Rani Mukherjee-like-voice on the IVR talks some nonsense about the way to trade on the particular day. “Markets likely to open low on weak global cues” or sometimes it “Markets likely to open high on strong global cues”. O my dear young lady, I have followed this trick ever since I started learning the spellings of “stocks”, “markets”, “scrips”, “Reliance”, “Jhunjhunwala”, and so on. And then she continues to say something about going LONG on something and/or going SHORT on something and/or combining some LONGS and SHORTS – none of which makes any sense to me. I told you, all this doesn’t go into my head. It is like “OCEAN’S ONE” for me, it is big gamble pool – go get it; loot it I mean. The lady’s perseverance could have made me inclined into studying some terms so that I could relate to her talks. However, it only disgusted me more and more, day-by-day.

This hopefully pretty lady muse of ICICI Direct used to call at 9.25am, when all the Bengali and Gujarati punters could have possibly had major chunk of the pie.

I prayed often, “Hey SEBI Deva, please inform your humble disciple, ICICI Direct, that now markets open at 9.00am and not 9.55am. What is the use of telling me how the markets will open when the markets have already opened?”

My prayers went unanswered, as they always do. I still receive those calls from ICICI Direct. I have tried everything possible to discontinue that service but in vain.

My disgust has touched such a new 52-week high that every morning the call comes, I just say, “yanchya Aai Chi Aai Chi Aai Direct jaun kuthe tari ghatli pahije”

Comments

Apurva Awasthi said…
Charts give a lots of info if you know how to read them.
It is a fact!

Why people are more happy when they make money in a bear market than in the bull market?
Anonymous said…
Gambler gambler...haan tu gambler..
Unknown said…
Just loved the last line...aai chi aai chi aai.... sounding so creative ! lol !
Anonymous said…
Yes, that is absolutely correct. The alerts or tips that come are absolutely useless.
Anonymous said…
last line is hilarious :)

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